the mudpond

A Spring in My Step

2005-11-14T10:45:00.000+08:00

Part four of a six-part series in a Worldview Meme.

What causes you to get out of bed with a "spring in your step"? (when you don't have something special to look forward to)

Only ONE thing.

And this would cause me to literally SPRING OUT OF BED: the alarm that failed to ring the waking hour.

But once out of bed, there are at least a couple of things that could put a jaunty spring to my step. Maybe even a gleam in my eye.

Citrus. Lemon, lime or orange.

In my morning sip, it’s delightfully uplifting. Brings out the zest in my spirit and the sparkle in my eyes.

In my morning shower and spritz, it's a clean and refreshing fragrance. Invigorating. It can increase my happiness levels by - oh, about 500% percent :)

In my lunch salad. Losing even 5 kilos will definitely lighten my frame enough to let me be-bop all the way to the work, all around the office, all day long ^-^

And then, there's my music of the moment.

Currently, it's the single Number 1 from the Goldfrapp album Supernature.

I think, if you play it loud enough through sufficiently bassy headphones, the pounding bass is enough to put a spring in the step of even the most jaded old grump. The last song that made me feel so irrepressibly bouncy was MJ's bomb track 'Rock With You' from his album Number One.

Oh, something that probably doesn't count as Bucko-Me-Uppo but would defintely evoke, at the end of a long day, a "how lovely is life" mindset would be: the sweet perfume of jasmine or tuber rose floating around me...

... and crisp clean sheets to fall asleep in, in a flush of contentment :)

Eyeballing A Stranger

2005-11-11T16:30:00.001+08:00

Part three of a six-part series in a Worldview Meme.

What goes through your mind when you meet the eyes of someone you don't know? How do you act/react?

How I react to strangers depends on who they are: 1) the 'powerful' - mostly adults 2) everybody else.

But first, there are 'actually-powerful' and 'perceived-powerful' people - folks higher up in the line of authority and social hierarchy than I. They both have the potential to make my life miserable; they can cause me untold hardship and pain if they have a reason or mind to. At a mere whim or fancy, they can lift me up or kill my joy.

What goes through my mind and how I react to them are two different things.

I really have to apply a truth-grid mindset to balance the negative, baggage-related, therapy-needing emotional conditioning with positive, freedom-related, value-constructing, and authenticity-producing emotions, flowing from my beautiful and joyous worldview.

Heh! Just invoking a pathetic oppressed-trampled-victim mindset there :P

And then, there are 'projected' powerful people. The peacock-n-turkey types - perpetually puffed up in their own self and imagined importance.

What goes through my mind is, most times, exactly how I react to them. Depending on my mood and the prevailing circumstances this can range from amusement to annoyance, benevolence :) to humouring or disdain to contempt...

Haughty? Well, possibly... :)

And for everyone else, my default emotional response is a feeling of solidarity, of semi-belonging, of companionship. I am 'safe' with kids, I am not 'distant' to a poor person, I am a 'fellow and friend' of a misunderstood teenager, I am a co-griever with a bereaved and broken-hearted parent or spouse. This is the default, pre-cognitive response I STRIVE FOR.

The same, I suspect, is true of the majority of people I know: the meek or fierce, alike.

That said, what goes through my mind when I meet strangers (or preferably, before we meet), I have an algorithm that I try to uniformly apply … a very simple 'script':

If (stranger = powerful): Convert2regular-like-me (powerful stranger), returning Stranger-with-needs-and-pains-like-me;
For All Strangers-with-needs-and-pains-like-me: Do Add.Some.Value.2.them

This algorithm, of course, is a biblical worldview item -- God made us all alike in the basic aspects of human-heart experience. It is only unrelieved pain and unmet needs and betrayed trust that cause us to develop into 'arrogants' and 'elites' and 'calloused, powerful monarchs'…

And that, my dear reader, is the/my peacock-n-turkey version of Her Royal Highness, The Empress Baggie's very spontaneous and unpretensious way of eyeballing a stranger:

The Queen looks at those folks right smack in their eyes and smiles. Most often the smile is returned. It's so pleasant and rewarding.

Giving The Noodles A Break

2005-11-10T11:10:00.000+08:00

Part two of a six-part series on a Worldview Meme

What is your mood and mindset when performing mundane and/or repetitive everyday tasks?

My mood varies. Today's comforting ritual could be tomorrow's joyless drudge. A routine that feels fulfilling today may not matter a hill of beans the next. It's just the occasionally-out-of-whack hormonal system.

At some level, I resent having to cook and clean, replenish the pantry, use the bathroom, trim my nails ... etc. So I have to constantly watch my mood and invoke my mindset to interpret these activities more favorably.

At default, the mood is that of mild annoyance, at having to divert precious time away from the fun and novel stuff in my life - blogging is one :) Applying mindset as a correction, I can change my mood to neutral-plus-five-percent gratitude with trace levels of residual-grudging. LOL! Okay, okay, so the mindset correction simply places those events into my larger worldview.

No-brainer tasks help me stay healthy for the fun and novel stuff. They 'ground' me firmly to practical necessities. They also allow time-space for ideas to percolate and grow in the background (which takes time cos I'm a little slow on the take), whereas if I didn't do some of this purely reflexive stuff, my germs of ideas will be doomed to never bloom.

So if it's something that involves order/value-creation (cooking, cleaning, filing) or value-delivery (going with mom to the wet market... ugh! ick!), I try to invoke the 'excellence' mindset. teehee :D But I try to do a quality piece of goodness-work (not perfection or OCD level, lah), but something that I won't later look back on and say: "I wish I would have smiled a bit and done that less grudgingly".

But there are a few mundane tasks I actually and positively enjoy as rituals, but mainly for closure reasons.

I LOVE doing the laundry. I love putting them out to dry and folding them after sniffing deeply their sun-toasted warmth. It somehow FEELS GOOD to see the empty basket and the lines bowing a little under the weight of an assortment of linen, inner/outer wear of all shapes, sizes, textures and colors. When it is ALL DONE, when everything is put away in its proper place and the line relaxes back to its taut state, I feel a deep satisfaction settle in. "It's all good", I tell myself.

And I LOVE washing dishes. I love doing this because it is a task that has a concrete closure point. When it is done, it is DONE. The sink is empty. I have literally washed my hands off a messy task.

Closure is wonderful because it lets me move on to the next thing - unencumbered. Without closure, I feel hobbled, unable to devote my fullest attention and resources to the next thing on the conveyor belt of daily life. Everyday mindless tasks give me a strong sense of accomplishment. They give me the kind of closure I NEVER CAN GET in the vast majority of my brain-n-energy-draining 'main projects' in life.

Many of my files are ALWAYS still 'OPEN', for someone might come up with a pushback that forces me to RE-OPEN the case. These are matters with implications, consequences and ramifications that reach so far out and deep, that closure often becomes an elusive or endless and sometime hopeless endeavor.

Like, my 'Culture & Society' file remains perpetually open because the world changes so fast there. Like, as close as we come to finally owning the car we've been FOREVER paying off, and then, in a blink and a snit, we trade in our 'freedom' for a spanking, brand new car. In place of closure and freedom from one debt, we pick up a whopping, grand new debt - to pay from scratch again.

In an age of endless consumption that keeps us chained to the millstone of debt - probably even to the grave - it is the routine, mindless stuff that helps us stay healthy, happy and sane.

Give the noodles a break, I say :)

Mindset & Philosophy for Everyday Life

2005-11-08T09:55:00.000+08:00

Part one of a six-part series on a Worldview Meme

What is your constant mindset and philosophy for everyday life?

(when not having a bad day)

In most of my waking moments I am most conscious of being in the companionship of God. He is -- invisible, of course -- a non-judgmental observer of my life. No weird 'mystical' aspect to this, generally. Just a quiet understanding of that reality.

We are in constant 'conversation'. I ask Him for insight. I share my observations, expressing always, my confusion or disappointment. It is a very, very warm and accepting, and constructive companionship.

I find that He constructively seeks my growth and development. Never harsh or abusive when I fail or when I am stubborn and despite the countless missed chances and resisted graces. Not even when I have my many tiny moments of micro-malice.

This makes my daily life exceptionally 'safe' and supportive. I am, accordingly, NEVER alone. I am always with a Wise Friend and (true) parent.

A spiritual expression of my philosophy for everyday life would be that I attempt to:

~ honor Him and what He loves (as He has honored me with His companionship and a life of significance)
~ please Him with true growth of heart, love and integrity.
~ enjoy Him and all His blessings (and difficulties) that present themselves to me each particular day.

Otherwise, I try (perhaps struggle is more apt!) to add a slice of value to everyone whom I come in contact with that day, wherever feasible.

~ be it in doing a good job...

~ encouraging others - whose mindset I almost certainly - and by necessity - impact by my words and actions, both casually and carelessly.

~ exhibiting non-demanding behavior,

~ being empathetic to those in suffering,

and/or being appreciative to those who add some value to MY life that day.

I think, I hope this philosophy might afford me the best of two approaches:
~ goal-oriented -- to maximize the value given and/or received that day;
~ life/warmth-oriented -- to ensure that my interactions are 'fuzzily human' and not just 'machine-level efficient'.

The balance of warmth and efficiency is important to me. I would forever be a machine, if it were only 'goal-oriented', and I would be forever miserable if ubiquitous-warmth always precluded tangible/visible achievement.

Uhm... okay, all these, I try... and I try... to do in my everyday life. As you might imagine, I don't always succeed.

Contagious Thinks

2005-11-06T16:31:00.000+08:00

THAT MEME. I should never have done it.

Why did I bite when I'd always ignored memes which to me, always seem too much effort for fluff? Because it bit me. Randomness coupled with minimum effort requirement. Nothing could be more alluring to an idle and lazy mind. Mine, that is.

Oh, don't get me wrong. Randomness by itself never has a snowball's chance in hell with me. Da Ma Cai will never get a sen of my hard-earned ringgit.

But bundle it up with minimum effort, twiddling thumbs and time to kill, what's to lose? On the contrary, when synapses simply refuse to fire up the neural network, it's a blog post.

But I really should have known better.

As if the first one were a virus, three days ago, another one popped up in my mailbox. This one was long. It came bearing questions that require unpacking. Me being me, long and seemingly innocuous questions always trigger a mouse-click. And here's the catch :

Memes are contagious ideas, all competing for a share of our mind in a kind of Darwinian selection.

Ah so. A survival of the fittest of ideas. I certainly have seen how that applies to other people's blogs. And I can certainly see, how it is now insinuating itself into mine. Sigh

A friend recently started re-thinking his worldview and chose to share his responses with friends, in meme fashion.

Well, of course, being far from lazy or idle this past week, had I felt so inclined, I could have done such navel-gazing the web way. But then, I never obsess about my navel - not any more, anyway - since my belly went under covers the day my dress size got promoted.

So why did I bite? How did it manage to bite me?

You see, my genes betray me. I'm a sucker for reciprocity. It'll be the death of my anonymity, layer by layer - one day.

Anyway, having expended much think-time and effort on this meme, I might as well blog it - for whatever it's worth. Who knows, it might be contagious enough to reward me with little glimpses of other people’s worldviews.

;)

There are six questions to which I will post my personal responses; one per post, in the coming days. One by one, because the depth of thought my friend attached to each response, was well… contagious.

1. What is your constant mindset and philosophy for everyday life? (when not having a bad day)

2. What is your mood and mindset when performing mundane and/or repetitive everyday tasks?

3. What goes through your mind when you meet the eyes of someone you don't know? How do you act/react?

4. What causes you to get out of bed with a "spring in your step"? (when you don't have something special to look forward to)

5. Are there any people that cause you unease for no apparent offense performed? How do you deal with this?

6. What goes through your mind and how do you react to a perceived indirect insult during a casual conversation?

If this meme interests you, feel free to pick it up for your own blog. Alternatively, you are most welcome to do it with me in the comment box. I'd be most honored :)

Activism - How To Conduct Yourself

2005-11-01T20:32:00.000+08:00

AS ANYONE WHO has encountered the challenge of getting things done would tell you, in business as in real life, you don't bring about sustained, meaningful change by edict. As a leader, you need to persuade, enthuse, and engage people in sufficient numbers to change behaviours, laws or processes. In business-speak, it's called Change Management.

And activism is Change Management writ large.

One of the gurus on this subject is John Kotter. In his book Leading Change he describes an effective process to getting people to do different things or things differently.

Seasoned and accomplished environmental activist Elizabeth May of the Sierra Club of Canada has writen a wonderful primer called How to Be an Activist that essentially uses Kotter's process.

Here are her hints for how to conduct yourself as an activist:

1. Refuse to be intimidated. If you are told that a subject is too technical or scientific for you to understand, don't believe it.

2. Be creative! Every campaign and issue has its own dynamic.

3. Don't take no for an answer. Be persistent, the squeaky wheel.

4. Ask lots of questions. Get to the bottom of issues. Do your homework.

5. Use the telephone. It is a great research tool.

6. Be unfailingly polite. Being persistent is not the same thing as being rude.

7. Leave no stone unturned. Ask people for help.

8. Give public credit and thanks.

9. You can accomplish anything, if you don't care who gets the credit.

10. Remember that politics is also personal. Watch out for burn-out. You'll need the support of friends and family. Build love into your campaigns.

This may seem simple and obvious. It is, and it works - if Elizabeth May's reputation is anything to go by. The main reason you don't see huge changes being wrought every day is human nature. And often times, change has to begin with the activist, before he can himself become a real change agent.

As Michael Moore's unfortunate speech at the Oscars so effectivley illustrated, sometimes how you do things is as important as what you do to bring about needed change.

Catching Flies With Honey

2005-10-28T04:07:00.000+08:00

"Think twice before trying to take us on because we will fight back.

I will fight back."

Wah.

Put that way, Peter Tan's warning gives rise to at least two perceptions. One: Abled people are attacking the disabled. Two: Activists, disabled or abled and the entire disabled community are odd and angry.

Peter, prominent paraplegic blogger and "current pro-tem President of a rights-based association for people with disabilities" is ANGRY. You'd have to be real stupid to have to think twice about that. He's FURIOUS. LIVID. OUTRAGED.

And I would be the last person to dispute that.

But I wonder what exactly it is he's actually angry about. And why. Who is taking him on, for what? But for now, I'd just like to keep a sharp focus on his fury rather than the 'what' and 'why' of it.

So.

In that strong warning, Peter, who has "worked with NGOs for people with disabilities for the past fifteen years" does not sound like he cares how anyone feels about it. About the disabled and/or actvists looking odd and angry, I mean.

Nevertheless.

If I may just think about it, aloud, here...

If Peter's mission is to change people's attitudes, then unfortunately he MUST care about what society at large (comprising mostly the able-bodied taxpayers who 'fund' those toilets ) thinks. He must change our perceptions for the sake of the disabled community. Thus he must make sure that his words -- letters, reports, interviews (to the authorities, sponsors, institutions, charitable and caring public and the media) -- are always rational, to the point, and preferably concerned or disappointed rather than outraged.

Now.

We all know that anger tends to put people on the defensive whereas concern and a rational argument can usually get a decent hearing. So, for the sake of the disabled, Peter Tan MUST be heard. The thing is, he will be heard most clearly NOT when he is shouting loudest and issuing warnings, BUT when he is communicating in such a way that people are willing to listen.

Oh. I believe I've just stumbled upon the 'why' of his anger.

These rights are in accordance with the United Nations Convention on Disabilities and is recognised by governments that are signatories to it. As I have often pointed out, these are rights, not privileges."

As a reaction to the lack of disabled-friendly access, the not-so-barrier-free environment -- do pardon that clunky sentence showing my ignorance, but you understand don't you, that I really coudn't hear anything above all that angry yelling -- very strong feelings (not actions, mind you) are understandable and entirely justified.

Perhaps it's his inability to deal with his anger in a constructive manner (the frustration) that leads him to create a raw dichotomy between oppressors and oppressed people. It's probably the same inability to manage his anger that has been a great hindrance (the futility-induced rage) to the advancement of the rights of the whatever association (if you heard him name it, please tell me) he represents, I think.

Over time (mind you, fifteen years is a long, long time to be unsuccessful), people tend to deal with their anger in different ways. Some take to protesting, some to screaming, hatred, and sarcasm. Others disconnect from society and surround themselves with only like-minded people, seeing society as a large conspiracy against the disabled.

Well, we all know how Peter Tan deals with it. We've heard that IT WORKS.

Now, I don't really think this does much to move society towards being more compassionate.

I sincerely believe Peter Tan needs a different approach. He needs to think twice before challenging someone, for instance, to dive into the pool so he can actually experience the same disability, sitting in a wheelchair. It's guaranteed NOT to engender compassion.

Perhaps Peter could TRY to READ/LISTEN CAREFULLY to what people are really saying. He could try to maintain a positive outlook and a sense of humor. It might make it easier for him to continue in activism and to avoid self-righteous fundamentalism. All this would make it possible to interact positively and constructively with others. Which will make him a real and more effective agent for social change.

"As someone who would have to consider making provisions for the handicapped or underpriviledged, I would rather I act on my own sense of responsibility, not charity, than to be thrust with some rule that artificially specifies how I should make those provisions."

- Whatever said here -

Forgive the animal cliché but, "You can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar". It is human nature to care more about pleasing a friend who has been wronged than an adversary. The reader of your blog is only human.

Persuade and convince, Peter. Don't alienate.

Rosa Parks Dies

2005-10-25T13:36:00.000+08:00

AND SPEAKING OF rights... there is none other more famous or infamous as her.

She was 42 when she committed an act of defiance in 1955 that was to change the course of American history and earn her the title "mother of the civil rights movement."

When she refused to get up, an entire race of people began to stand up for their rights as human beings.

Rosa Parks died on Monday, of natural causes at the ripe old age of 92

Here is a gentle woman who sparked a revolution. A woman of quiet strength, a true heroine.

Truly, I feel like one light in the world has gone out.

In A Jam

2005-10-25T10:30:00.000+08:00

... AND COME TO think of it, when it comes to standing up for my own rights, I'm stuck between being meek and fierce.

I'd bought a jar of Lemon Curd from a small but well established mini-market the previous weekend. Friday morning, drooling at the thought of that delicious, zesty creamy stuff on toast, I opened it.

The lid didn't pop. Horrors! A tiny patch of mould on the luscious, lemony curd!

At the thought of mycotoxin-producing fungi in my favourite breakfast spread, indignation rose. Sheeze... I paid good money for it and it was spoilt! I absolutely MUST send it back.

But the hassle (besides traveling and parking costs) of going back to the store as well as losing at least one hour in pursuit of rectification added up to quite a deterrent.

I did the next best thing. Rang and asked to speak to the Buying Manager, or The Boss (since this wasn't a Cold Storage or Tesco, or Giant or any of those Big Flers). Frankly, I didn't expect to be put through, but I was. I didn't expect to be allowed to exchange, at another outlet or time convenient to me, but I was.

What a pleasant surprise! Especially since a friend who bought an expensive bra with a faulty clasp from a leading departmental store had to go all the way to the same store to exchange it, even though they had a store within walking distance of her office.

I was luckier. The Boss was profusely apologetic and instantly offered the exchange. No receipts necessary - no ifs, no buts, no questions asked.

Having resolved that to my satisfaction, without any of the anticipated stress, I made no plans to execute my exchange.

Yes, I'm one of those who start out on a high horse to seek redress but an apology is usually good enough, if, to exact the requisite pound of flesh means a further investment of my time and attention.

But The Boss thought otherwise. At 5pm the same day, a hamper arrived at home, crammed with goodies by the same manufacturer of the Lemon Curd. All, probably worth 15 – 20 times what I paid for that jar of Lemon Curd.

Unaccountably, I immediately regretted being so cross earlier. After all, wasn't it just a tiny patch of mould, smaller than a 1 sen coin? Why fuss over such a trivial thing when this very moment, thousands of Indian and Pakistani earthquake victims are probably having, at best, the barest minimum of nutrition, if any? My complaint had also caused the whole batch of Lemon Curd to be pulled off the shelves.

I found myself faced with a chore of having to return the hamper. Keeping it might be pandering to my greed, the something-for-nothing syndrome.

This episode gave me much (and needless) food for thought.

I wish I could be one of those so certain of the correctness of their action that they have no qualms – whether giving subordinates bad reports leading to dismissal or telling serving staff off in restaurants even when service is just a notch below perfect.

They are only doing what is right and their right, as they usually declare. I too was standing up for my rights, but I couldn't help wondering if I over-reacted, when I saw that hamper.

My sister on hearing my plans to return the hamper, made the problem worse by asking "Why, didn't they inconvenience you?"

They did but the gift was out of proportion, I argued. Then she kicked it in: "If you send it back, they might think you're still miffed. That you expect a RM500 voucher"

Would they? Surely not!

To cut a long story short, I tore into the hamper and randomly distributed one third of it to my family members, and kept the rest for myself. And then I went back to the store and spent RM80+ on some dry groceries before other arguments against that move surfaced to change my mind. It was a sort of a quid pro quo.

Blessed are the meek for they would have scraped off the mould, eaten the rest of the curd without a peep and saved time and thought for more fruitful pursuits.

And blessed too are those never assailed by self-doubt when they rap on the counter and demand First Class service or their money back.

Unfortunately, I'm stuck somewhere in between the two groups.

Not laidback enough to say: never mind, tough luck, I bought a lemon. Yet not strong enough in my convictions when rewarded for my trouble, to take a generous gesture as my wholly-justified dessert.

Stand Up But Don't Lose It

2005-10-23T15:24:00.000+08:00

The meal was horrible from start to finish. The service was bad; the food was poorly executed; wine never arrived at the table... plus a series of small things like empty water glasses, unfilled coffee cups, bread baskets not being refilled and long waits between courses. PLUS. They felt ignored by the STUPID waiting staff. AND they threatened to walk out without paying.

This happened in a fine but very busy restaurant where I dined last night. As the irate diner unleashed a tirade of hot and harsh words, a hush fell and all activity froze. Even as he 'lost it', he held the entire restaurant in thrall.

Many people I know shirk at the idea of making an official complaint, preferring to vote with their feet.

But there is a growing awareness of consumer rights and people are more willing to stand up for themselves now than, say, a decade ago. Consumers are not only getting more assertive, which is probably due to very competitive marketing in almost every sphere, but they are increasingly willing to express their grievances when they feel they aren't getting value for money. People are becoming angrier, but constructively so.

Yes, sometimes we do need to kick up a fuss.

We owe it to ourselves – and to the guilty establishment, if it is serious about wanting to improve. So when your fluffy pancakes turn out to be a load of old crepe, you have a right to send them back to the kitchen post-haste, if you're paying good money for them.

This is not to say it's open season on belly-aching about every and anything. It's just that there's a simple rule to it.

COURTESY

Always

Flying off the handle over a fly in your soup won't endear you to anyone. Seeking out the person in charge, refusing to be fobbed off and making yourself heard in a reasonable, concise way, will usually bring the satisfaction of an apology and sometimes more.

But refusing to be fobbed off doesn't mean you let loose a string of “YOU ARE STUPID" to each and every explanation the restaurant staff attempts to make. Verbal abuse is NEVER a substitute for logic or facts.

An apology, when proffered, is NEVER be an invitation to heap on more insults and further verbal abuse.

IT'S AN OPPORTUNITY TO BE GRACIOUS. It may even be an opportunity to regain your dignity for having 'lost it' in the first place.

Thumping your chest and saying, for instance, "I am the President of CAP, therefore, I KNOW I am right, because.. " does not confer upon you more rights than the ordinary consumer.

Right is as right is.

Stating one's case firmly and politely when things go wrong gives the offending party a chance to make amends, but, only if you go about it the correct way. By being politely assertive in a restaurant, you can get things off your chest without cleavers drawn at 10 paces.

Whining and dining never look good

If the restaurant ignores your complaint, don't get mad, get even. Leave quietly and feel free to spread the word among your friends. It's more dignified than blowing your stack in front of other patrons and far more damaging in the long run.

Come to think of it, whether it be our expectations on the quality of service in a restaurant or our right of exclusive access to public toilets, don't we want to enjoy our rights in a dignified fashion?

The 23/5 Meme

2005-10-17T10:30:00.000+08:00

I DON'T USUALLY do memes. BUT. As you'll find later in this post, this, my first meme couldn't have been more timely :)

After weeks of being sprayed with such crap as social responsibility = invoking the ISA when you get some stupid rant in your comment box, blogging mentors, sifu-ism and the notion (gasp!) of blogger generations.

The 23/5 Meme via e pur si muove
1. Dig into your archives

2. FInd your 23rd post
3. Find the 5th sentence (or closest to) and post it in your blog along with these instructions.

The result:

There is no God of Blogs to smite you.

Right on.

Well, my dear fellow bloggers, it may have been 204 days since I posted this, but amid so much "we know best" fairy piss, I think we couldn't need to be reminded of this, more than we do now.

Cheers! and a Happy Monday Morning, to all you bloggers (pro, vet or novice) out there

The Alpha Course

2005-10-09T19:34:00.000+08:00

Disclaimer:

BUKAN UNTUK ORANG ISLAM

Still on the subject of God….

This should be of interest to anyone, even non church-goers, with questions about life, faith and God. Nicky Gumbel, founder of the Alpha course will be in Kuala Lumpur on 10 & 11 November. Although Alpha is an Anglican evangelization programme on the basics of Christianity, it has spread into Roman Catholic churches in over 153 countries.

I have attended some of the supper meetings in my parish. The teaching videos are not only enlightening and informative, they’re actually quite entertaining. Had it not been for work commitments, I would have completed the entire 10-week course, which concluded recently.

I have often wondered how could God forsake Jesus just when he needed him most. And until Nicky Gumbel, no one had satisfactorily explained (to me) the mystery behind Christ's anguished words (quoting Psalm 21) as he hung, in torments, on the cross:

'Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani?
My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?

These words articulate so well, so poignantly the challenge that innnocent suffering poses to the belief of God.

These words of despair, the cry of dereliction reveal the heart of what Christ suffered on our behalf. He suffered the same Godforsaken-ness as Jews of the Holocaust must have suffered. As all innocent victims of human injustice, famine, disease and disaster must have and will continue to suffer.

Where is God?

2005-10-09T14:27:00.000+08:00

It’s been barely a year since the deadliest undersea earthquake of the century sparked a killer tsunami that took 220,000 lives in Asia. Just over a month since Hurricane Katrina claimed over a thousand lives in Amercia. Now as then, at a loss to explain the massive losses in human lives and property, the oft-asked question is:

Where is God?

As the quake death toll in India and Pakistan speeds past 2,000, a poor villager grieving the loss of his 14-year-old daughter spoke of God’s wrath:

"When the earthquake came it was like Judgment Day,"

UPDATE: The International Herald Tribune said the death toll in Pakiston may be speeding up to 30,000.

Like latter-day Jobs bewailing our fates, we ask and ask, as we have asked of the Holocaust, of the African genocides, of Darfur, of 9-11, of the blasts in Bali and London and Bali again... Is there a God?

In grief and suffering, anyone’s faith will be tested. I can only guess at the anger and pain that the bereaved feel. Who can blame any one of them for directing it like a guided missile at the very foundation of whatever beliefs they have.

Why did this happen to those poor folk, most of whom, whose lives surely, were already miserable enough?

Disaster understandably causes people to doubt the existence of God.

But tsunamis, hurricanes and earthquakes, cannot, in reason, have any possible bearing, by itself, on the question of whether or not there is a God. It cannot amount to a revelation, or even a confirmation, that God does not exist.

Still, we ask:

Why would God allow such suffering?

A perfectly legitimate question.

There is an uniquely belief-undermining quality about natural disasters on the scale recently seen. But why on earth should that be so? We know all too well that undeserved pain, injury, disease, and loss of life are daily facts of life for hundreds of millions of people on the planet. Indeed, presumably in the course of human history, billions of people, rich and poor, weak and strong, have suffered and died from causes not of their own making but as a result of a terrible accident.

Natural disasters seem especially faith-threatening. Partly because of their scale. Partly because for most of the first few thousand centuries of human history, such events were ascribed to some divine force.

As if, somewhere in our genes, there is a tendency to take a little too literally the insurance company terminology that even lightning is an“act of God”.

Human beings have always told stories to explain natural disasters. Most cultures have deep at their core a flood myth in which the great bulk of humanity is destroyed and a few are left to repopulate and repurify the human race. In most of these stories, God is meting out retribution, punishing those who have strayed from his path. The devastation starts a new history, which will be on a higher plane than the old.

I find such explanations repugnant. It is repugnant to imply that the people who suffer from natural disasters somehow deserve their fate.

Tsunamis, hurricanes and earthquakes. Tragic and horrific as they are, they are simply irrelevant, or at least supernumerary, to the question of whether a benign God exists.

Thank Goodness!

2005-10-02T22:01:00.000+08:00

Good sense prevails. Inspite of the (some say, insulting) suggestion that he would be practising double standards if he didn’t/doesn’t “set an example”.

Not that that was EVER any doubt he would not toss trash right where it belongs. It’s also good to note that so far, others also recognise trash.

Trash it, Delete it, Zap it, Nuke it to cyber oblivion, as others did.

Only don’t invoke “Et Tu, Bloggers?”

" Common sense is the knack of seeing things as they are,

and doing things as they ought to be done.

– Harriet Beecher Stowe -

Humpty Dumpty, Again

2005-10-01T09:22:00.000+08:00

THERE'S FAIRY PISS rain out there, now.

It's Saturday morning and I’m home. Stuck with a bored four-year old.

He’s circling the lounge in the exaggerated, pantomime manner that little macho predators have. He’s planting one foot after the other, as far left and as far right, as his stout little legs can stretch, without losing his centre of gravity. Swaggering wobbily about. In his faux gruff voice, the little grunt is going:

"Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall,

Humpty Dumpty had a big fall... "

over and over and OVER and OVER again.

Arrggh!!

I’m reading blogs, trying my very best to ignore the annoying lil grunt. And his silly lil ditty.

And, oh my 'Goodness Gracious Me!’ [sic]

A tall poppy is showing us an outstanding example of double standards. He is precariously perched.

Anyone who even pretends to understand the concept of public opinion will know that Web Polls are roughly (only) an offline equivalent to straw polls. Many news sites (MSNBC, for instance) integrate web polls into every one of their stories. They all know that, although a popular way to aggregate opinion online, webpolls are far from effective in accurately reflecting public opinion. What more, in a country with such low internet penetration, like ours.

Jeff Ooi and his readers also know that Web Polls are far from a representative sampling method.

"To skim the cream of people's instantaneous thoughts"

ABSOLUTELY.

Now, why would ANYBODY who's ever been in a Form Five classroom, least of all, our clever politicians, be so gullible as to think... Oh hey, Politics 101 has the story.

How exactly did Kit’s poll earn the denigration of "faulty and irrelevant"?

GOODNESS GRACIOUS ME!!

Any Sixth Former would know the discursive model is a far more fruitful way to examine opinion on the internet. Therefore, if conversation is a determining factor of public opinion, then, it can be said that blogs are reflective of public opinion.

Wait.

Most times there is no real deliberation occurring in these conversational arenas called blogs. Most times.

Hmm... so, perhaps, we no longer need to put Humpty Dumpty back together again. Perhaps, we simply need to distribute him.

The sun is coming out. And the little grunt is greedily gobbling up his breakfast of scrambled eggs on toast.

Jerks

2005-09-27T17:10:00.000+08:00

Jerking the Long (H)Arm of the Law and Up To No Good....

“Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall
Humpty Dumpty had a big fall
All the King's horses and all the King's men
Couldn't put Humpty together again"

Many childrens' nursery tales such as Humpty Dumpty have an entirely different meaning than the one we know. In earlier times, any criticism of the ruling order was considered as sedition or treason and you were likely to lose your head as well as other parts of your anatomy if you voiced them. But this didn't stop people from talking about and commenting on events, you just had to be careful how you voiced them. Hence the 'kids' songs, where the references to the ruling class' policies of the day were encrypted into a language where everybody knew what the words really meant.

Alas, Blogosphere too has its own Humpty Dumpty.

There will always be haves and have-nots and those with a vested interest in silencing voices that could 'cause trouble' and the werewithal to do it.
There will always be those who do not feel what they have to say is worth saying.
And there will always be those who yell out their message but are too far ahead of everyone else to be taken seriously.

Blogosphere needs its independence from the mainstream. It has values, rules and a culture of its own. But it is not set apart. It has borders where it meets other worlds: membranes through which ideas, images and customs all percolate. It is also a new world, where pathfinders and pioneers have much to say. It is also where the landless can stake claims, the frustrated find opportunities. So what matters in the virtual world, this relatively new land of opportunity? Perhaps, above all, this:

Will we use it to let ALL voices be heard?

Blog Buster: A Chilling Effect

2005-09-24T14:46:00.000+08:00

Recently, across the Causeway...

When Singaporean authorities invoked the sedition act and charged local bloggers for posting racist comments on an online forum, commentators said it had a chilling effect on the Singapore Blogging community (useful links & related posts here)

Meanwhile, back home in Malaysia... (femes bloggers, links not necessary)

Celebrity blogger Peter Tan lodged a police report against 'Good Man' for "posting abusive messages containing racial slurs".

According to a press report, "He said if this is allowed to go unchecked, it will give a negative impression of bloggers." Internet and media savvy Peter Tan is believed to have provided details of the sender’s IP address to the police.

Blogger Ameer Zulkifli aka Mack Zulkifli also lodged a similar report against the same poster for sending a 'seditious' or 'insulting' message that was NOT PUBLISHED (!)on his blog.

"Ameer called on responsible bloggers to notify the police of seditious messages posted in their blogs."

*shudder*

THE CHILLING EFFECT OF BLOGGERS INVOKING THE SEDITION ACT.

“In the zest to be obliging to the authorities, some bloggers have failed to be responsible for their own space and invoked one of the most ugliest piece of legislation to stifle rants.”
Chez 1978 said here

All of a sudden, the idea that the Internet is not a safe place has taken on a whole new dimension. Not just for bloggers, but for blog commentors as well. I fear proponents of freedom of expression may now have a negative impression of Malaysian bloggers :) :P

What is so potent about plain stupidity that we need invoke FEAR by raising the spectre of the Sedition Act?

Why, I wonder, is a blog that "stresses the freedom of expression" password-protecting related posts (as the post titles clearly indicate) that, doubtless, are of public interest?

BUKAN UNTUK ORANG ISLAM

2005-09-21T11:05:00.000+08:00

I WAS about to click "Publish" when my index finger froze.

All that talk about the (il)legality of off or online 'speech', (self)censorship...

It was this bit (okay, it's a chunk, an insighful one) by chez 1978 that gave me pause for thought:

The interesting bit is whether the site becomes a private or public space. You know, if what is illegal offline is illegal online, I wonder if all this gathering in virtual space counts as illegal assembly. Would we have to apply permits if we call an assembly in chatrooms?

If physical assembly is the crucial recipe, then what is to deny us the same application in the instance of public and private speech? Contrary to many Malaysians who believe that the internet and the real world are the same, the cyberspace is actually a unique medium. O'Brien (see links) included secret to the mix, but the point is what I have been trying to yell at you guys for some time now - the real world and the virtual world have very different boundaries. Does the internet spell the end of private speech? How can we keep free speech alive, when there is no way to keep it at all by the definition of our some enthusiasts for law and order?

For one thing, she raises a rather fundamental question as to whether or not the Internet is a public sphere. (for those inclined to examine this issue, a logical place to start would be 'Habermas and the Public Sphere' - just google it).

The other thing – that bit on information poisoning - it brought back memories of my expatriate days in Brunei, where all non-Muslim eateries are legally required to prominently display this sign:

BUKAN MAKANAN UNTUK ORANG ISLAM

The same law applies for supemarkets, where non-halal goods may only be displayed and sold in a separate room.

But coming back to what I was about to publish - an article that came in last Sunday's church bulletin... it's a document issued by The Catholic Bishops' Conference of Malaysia. An informative piece titled:

THE LEGAL IMPLICATIONS OF CONVERSION TO ISLAM.

Not exactly hot-off-the-press news, I know, but I think it's every bit as relevant today as when the Sharmala Sathyaseelan case - a case concerning denial of religious freedom - went to court a couple of years ago.

One more thing is relevant here. Another disclaimer (so tiresome, isn't it?)

The point of this post is not to stir up or ressurect anything. It is merely a reminder that in all matters, particularly those concerning faith and conversion, please do make an informed choice and look before you leap.

Oh Wait. In the spirit of the moment (ahem!) it might be prudent at this juncture, to state very clearly:

NI POST
BUKAN UNTUK ORANG ISLAM.

(pardon the bad Malay. The language, I mean )

Now, I haven't been able to locate an online version, (if anyone knows, please point me there) so I am reproducing it here, verbatim:

Dear Sisters and Brothers in the Lord,

If you convert to Islam, there are important changes in your legal status and what you can or cannot do.

Your conversion to Islam will be registered with the Religious Department and the National Registration Department, both of which are computerised so access to this information is available throughout the country.

Under Syariah enactments of most of the 13 states of Malaysia;

Conversion back to your former religion is either

a) not allowed under the law, or b) a criminal offence which means that you may be fined, whipped, detained or imprisoned under most State Islamic laws.

If you are under 18 years of age, you require your parents permission to convert to Islam. Your identity card will record your conversion to Islam.

Therefore, even if you are no longer practising, you may be fined, whipped, detained or imprisoned for violation of Syariah laws such as praying in Church, eating in public during fasting month, "khalwat", etc.

You cannot marry a non-Muslim. If you decide to divorce and attempt to convert out of Islam, you will lose custody of your children because they are Muslims.

Upon death, your non-Muslim relatives will lose their rights to any property, money etc, that you want to leave to them. The corpse of a convert to Islam will be taken away from his or her non-Muslim family for Islamic rites and burial even if you have not been a practising Muslim for many years.

In the event that your spouse converts to Islam, you may have no right to either your children or your spouse's property.

We know that certain Christians who convert to Islam for whatever reason, are not aware of or do not consider seriously the implications of such conversion. Hence the need to inform you.

By this, we are neither against Islam nor freedom of religion, which is guaranteed for all Malaysians in article 11 of our Constitution which gives the right to an individual to choose freely his or her religion.

But to choose correctly, you need to know clearly what you choose and the consequences of your choice.

signed
Archbishop Murphy Pakiam (KL),
Bishop Antony Selvanayagam (Penang)
Bishop Paul Tan, SJ (Melaka-Johor).

Okay, that's it.

By the way, something else chez said bears repeating:

Now that most of us are now focusing on the sedition act, it is already admitting the remarks of "Good Man" as evidence for its malice intent.

Well, let me just put it this way, I WISH THE SAME LAW CAN BE APPLIED TO INFORMATION POISONING ON THE INTERNET, BLOGGER OR NO BLOGGER. But I won't support it, why? Because I do not agree with our laws who threatens to send people to jail for being stupid.

Reheated Pizza

2005-09-13T17:30:00.000+08:00

AH, SO. You came by.

I remember what you said about pizza.

A slice of pizza is at its peak when served and eaten piping hot from the oven.

One that has been sitting around for a couple of hours will be much less appealing.

The crust will have dried out and hardened, the sauce will have congealed, the cheese will have turned to rubber and the toppings will have dried out.

You can stick it back into the oven.

Or nuke it in the microwave.

Sure it warms everything up.

But you can't revive it without turning it into a puppy's chew toy.

Beauty & The Beast

2005-09-12T15:54:00.000+08:00

I FIND GREAT beauty in the atmospheric process...

Where I am, a storm is gathering and brewing up. It's gonna be a real cracker - big , heavy rumbles and hard cracks of thunder.

Storms can be awesome in their grandeur and power,

sublime in their appearance,

and inspirational in their complexity.

There's a primal and terrible beauty in a raging storm. Their power is truly, truly awesome to behold.

And strangely, the pounding in my head has stopped.

You win some, you lose some

2005-09-12T10:37:00.000+08:00

IT'S DEFINITELY A day of mixed emotions.

First off, it's a Monday, traditional day of dread and ugh for worker bees. For those of us who tend to lean toward the blind optimism side of the scale, the dread gets mixed with a generous helping of "Hooray! It's a brand new week and anything is possible!" which leads to a general attitude of confusion-induced crankiness.

Second, it's CT & Mabel's birthdays, so there will be joyous celebration and cake! - two of the things that make me happy. No, not really, the second thing I never eat. No prizes for guessing why. Ah, but the first, the sparkly one, I never refuse. It really makes me really, seriously bubbly. And funny. And silly. And a third thing: there'll surely be mooncakes as well, which I simply cannot resist. Wait, I'm not at all sure mooncakes go well with wine. I know it goes well with tea; ocha or chinese tea, that is; not teh tarik. And thanks to Jill's recent trip to Toronto, there will also be maple-cream filled chocolates shaped like maple leaves.

Cake and Wine. Mooncakes and tea. And maple cream chocs. (con)fusion food?

It is also Jack's first day at the office, our new friend and colleague, and new friends and colleagues are always worth celebrating. I suppose.

The seriously mixed part of the emotions comes from learning that one very elderly family friend passed away last week. That's four funerals for the past thirty days. Stop. I don't want to dwell on the sadnesss, but I do want to say that he was very nice to my dog (years ago), very nice to my friend, and was a very nice person with a nice family; inviting, welcoming, and with large hearts..

Do you ever think about what you would like your funeral to be like? Hymns, flowers, casket, hearse... How about your obituary?

Oops, morbid thought. Quash that.

This is a really silly post. Must be something in this morning's coffee, I had two already. Forgot that Mary is always cranky Mondays.

My head is buzzing and spinning. Throbbing from the pounding that's going on inside my skull.

It's deafinitely a day of fusion and confusion. Definitely, I mean

I think I'd better go home after lunch.

Daylight Upon Magic

2005-09-10T12:27:00.000+08:00

SOMETIME LAST WEEK, I drove through a brisk little rain shower that lasted perhaps ten minutes. A short while later, the sun broke through and a brilliant rainbow arched majestically over the LDP. It was a magical sight and a wonderful way to end a long, difficult week.

The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain

~ Dolly Parton ~

Now I know it sounds silly and childish, but I always get a thrill when I see a rainbow. To me it's a symbol of hope. I mean, rainbows are not just pretty, they make me feel like good things are coming. This is not very rational thinking, of course. But - unabashedly, I admit - many of the best things in my life are not based on logic or reason... So there you go... [now what would Dr. Spock or Spock & Tuvok say, I wonder]

So okay, maybe I do need to hop off that silly carousel. Be more mindful of the need for reality to balance my addiction to whimsy. Let cold hard facts weigh in objectively for a more grounded perspective. Oh, very well then, here we go...

Rainbows are an optical phenomena. They are caused by light bouncing off the insides of raindrops. The colours occur because different colours (wavelengths) of light are refracted by different amounts. This all, I understand from Unweaving the Rainbow: Science, Delusions and the Appetite for Wonder.

By the way, this book is really more about the position of science in general in our culture, than it is about science. The title comes from Newton's discovery that the rainbow is not a mystical bridge to a pot of gold, but light split up into its elements.

I feel so damn cheated. Where got that 'fantastical boof of fairyfloss' waiting? :-S But well, airy-fairy aside, I suppose, you can't possibly get nerdier than Newton. Trust him to take away the beauty of a rainbow by explaining the science behind it. I'll take ole man Dr Seuss anytime!

Anyhow, in these things, brains trump fairy floss. Anytime, everytime.

Dawkins (of The Selfish Gene fame, and who, some critics have labelled, imo ironically, a 'greedy reductionist') makes the point that understanding something and seeing it for what it really is does not diminish the experience, but makes it even more beautiful. Douglas Adams (who wrote the critically acclaimed The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy) also addressed the issue:

"I will take the awe of understanding over the awe of ignorance any day."

He brilliantly adds that, understanding where we come from, who we are related to and how this vast, complex gene machine works does not make us less human or special. All it does is bring us closer to the world around us.

Why can't the fact that white light contains the full spectrum of beautiful colors be amazing?

Do we have to leave the world unexplained to appreciate it?

Why, indeed.

Because Ordinary Me have found what some unknown person of obscure origins once said to be not only true, but validated. Throughout my entire (unbrilliant) life. Over and over again.

"Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterwards,"

Does logic preclude or predispose the need for creativity and imagination? Tell me, who can deny that our complex universe is an astounding, majestic marvel?

The mere contemplation of its vastness and grandeur causes our heads (most especially airy ones like mine) to spin. It is after all, our appetite for wonder that drives us to explore, discover and investigate the marvellous natural phenomena that never fail to astound and intrigue us, to tease and to egg us on. And to push and stretch the limits of our imagination. And thus, our very limited understanding of our ourselves, our existence, our lives, our world and other worlds.

It is also, after all, our sense of marvel that gives us an intuitive feeling of the unity of the cosmos, a oneness grounded in scientific fact: we are made of the same stuff as all of creation. Everything that is, was, or will be started off together as one infinitesimal point: the cosmic seed.

Who cares if rainbows are not good omens? They're still beautiful and magical anyway.

Trite & Tired

2005-09-04T19:00:00.000+08:00

OH, SPEAKING OF 'high falutin'...

Ever thought how business speech and business writing are sometimes little more than high falutin' talk, filled with pretentious, overused images and puff phrases?

As soon as an authoritative author or a pontificating pundit unveils a clever new verbal invention, it's blasted around the world on the 24-hour news cycle, and everyone scrambles to be the first to use it in email or a meeting… like erm… ‘pushing the envelope’

Here are a few that once were clever and colorful, but now (I find) to be quite trite and tired…

on our radar screen
means "in our awareness". With a little imagination, it can transcend right into our zen-like stream of consciousness.... Very clever-sounding, eh?

on the ground
Desperately trying to remain vital, this one is transforming itself into "boots on the ground." It's probably military in origin — a flyer's or paratrooper's term. Ditto ‘bite the bullet” and “roll with the punches”, hopeful phrases used to magically confer the subject with an aura of stoicism if not actual courage, but in reality really reflect an absolutely hopeless and helpless state.

ahead of the curve, behind the curve

The 'power curve' describes the relationship between drag, airspeed and vertical speed for an aircraft. In business, the 'ahead' form means advanced or innovative, while the 'behind' form means "in too deep to ever dig out." Originally, using this image meant you were a pilot, which carried status. No longer.

Pursuant to
And with all due respect, while I don’t question the occasional (and human) need to sound self important, this very officious phrase, (sighted recently, rather interestingly, in a blog) - unless you’re pretending to be a corporate lawyer - sounds, really, quite pompous.

:O... waittaminit...

with all due respect

Probably popularized in modern times by Perry Mason or those characters on C-SPAN, this one is a real oldie. See, the patriotism entry in The Devil's Dictionary, by Ambrose Bierce.

And, that said, having said that
We used to say 'but'. Nowadays we seem to need more syllables.

And… at the end of the day, bottom line
If there is any beauty in the economy of words, how about saying 'finally'? 'Bottom line' comes from accounting and finance, and used to be cute. Used to be.

Got any to share?

Rats

2005-09-01T11:06:00.000+08:00

I am very sorry to have to do this. I've no idea what I've done to attract them

The smallest things...

2005-08-31T11:45:00.000+08:00

From the Gospel of Luke 12:22-31:

If the smallest things, therefore, are outside your control, why worry about the rest?
Think about the flowers, they never have to spin or weave, yet I assure you, not even Solomon in all his regalia was robed like one of these.

Star Jasmine